Text message. 10:24pm. Tuesday night.
Hi.
Any idea when you’ll be home?
When I arrived home from work earlier that day, I didn’t automatically run to my bedroom to take off my bra and throw on sweat pants and put my hair in a ponytail, like I normally do. In fact, that morning I had chosen what I thought was my cutest outfit and wore that to work. I was going to rock it from 9 to 5 and then again from 7:30 until the night was through. I had plans. Night-out type plans. Ladies night type plans. No kids allowed type plans.
Julie Cole, of Mabel’s Labels fame was in town for a short while and so a blogger meetup was clearly in order. I was over-the-moon excited to get together with other ladies who share this same passion that I do, some who I feel as though I’ve known forever, most whom I have never met face to face.
Heather from Mmm… is for Mommy, Lynette from My Wee View, and Julie from Mabel’s Labels all in one picture… which also happens to be the only picture anyone got.
Also in attendance: writer Eleanor Beaton, Jen from A Busy Mommy, and Lila from Sweet and Lovely Crafts. Now, go stalk these awesome ladies!
I am lucky to have a husband who graciously supports these night outs. I leave him to do bedtime solo more often than he leaves it to me. He knows what he is doing and the kids are always safe and happy in his care, but we each have our individual strengths and weaknesses.
Text message: 10:26pm
I think milk has spilled out of Gavin’s cup to behind his bed. It was a very full cup. Now totally empty. And bed is wet where it was upside down.
When the messages first started rolling in, I was a little annoyed. The evening was coming to an end, if only because the restaurant was closing. My husband knew how important this evening was for me: how nervous excited I was for it. He couldn’t be rushing me home, could he?
And then I started thinking about how the milk had spilled. All sippy cups are not made equal. We have leaky sippy cups destined for the big kid or for the dinner table and we have the holy grail of sippy cups which can be thrown into purses or used in bed or given to a arm-flailing baby. We run our dishwasher in a perfect rhythm with the cycles of the good sippy cups so that we are never without one. I would bet my life that every adult in this household can differentiate between the good and the bad sippy cups, considering it sometimes feels like a matter of life or death.
But apparently not.
“I didn’t know that cup leaked!” said Dan, about the second worst sippy cup that he had filled with milk and placed in the baby’s bed.
Sometimes I feel like I’m the only one in this household with half a brain. Sometimes I wonder if anyone is paying any attention or if maybe the toilet paper roll and the dishwasher are invisible and it is my super-power to see them. Sometimes I question how socks seem to reproduce at an exponential rate on my living room floor when the hamper is a mere twenty steps away. Sometimes I wonder if I’m the only one who ever does anything around here!
Except — on Tuesday night I went out for drinks and food with some fabulous women. My husband made dinner and I left before bedtime. I did not change diapers. I did not take the three-year-old to the bathroom twentymillion times after lights out. I did not fill sippy cups full of milk and “FreshCold water” and love.
Dan and I see our home differently. I see the food crumbs on the kitchen floor after food prep, he sees the organized chaos of my piles in the bedroom. We also parent differently. I stick to schedules and insist on baths and differentiate between sippy cups. Dan lets the toddler share his pyjamas with the baby and finishes the day with tickles before bed.
So what if he chose the wrong sippy cup? I decided not to cry over the spilled milk. I’m glad he doesn’t focus on the same things that I do because my kids get to experience love and parenting in different ways. And while the baby probably didn’t care about the wet bed, he undoubtedly loved the out of the ordinary pre-bed silliness that Daddy brought.
And I had an awesome night. At least no wine was spilled. But, hey Julie? Maybe you can come up with labels to highlight the good the sippy cups?
Good for your to get a night out – and I’m jealous you got to hang-out with Julie(Love her!). And it’s true – as much as I love getting out, sometimes it’s hard for me to just ‘let it go’ and let my husband parent – even when it does it WRONG(lol), I mean differently than I do. xo
tracy@sellabitmum recently posted..The Friends We Make On The Internet
It’s so hard to let go of that control, at least for me. I know it’s not fair, and I do my best :)
angela recently posted..Packing Away Their Friends
My husband is happy for me to go out, as long as it’s in the afternoon and everyone has pooped for the day. And his parents are on standby in case of the latter. ;)
Glad you got a fun night out!
Alison recently posted..4 Tips to Prevent Baking Disasters
Most days I swear Hubs has a better grasp of the whole parenting situation than I do, LOL. It was such a fun night!
Heather, Mmm… is for Mommy recently posted..Wild Blueberry Crumble Pie
Sometimes I think that it’s for the best that Derek and I parent differently as well! (Who, by the way, also would not know which sippy cups leak.)
It was so nice to meet you that evening! When I got home Claire (5 yrs) got out of bed to find out what took me so long to get back home.
Very early on in our parenting lives I learned that if I want David’s help I have to stand back and let him do things his way. I’m happy to do that. Do I sometimes get frustrated because he doesn’t do it my way? Of course, but I’m still glad he is such an active, participative dad.
What a great evening! I told you about the vase right? :) I totally get it!
Yes, we see different things, but that’s what helps us hopefully makes us a well rounded couple
Lynette recently posted..Movie Date with a Turtle’s Tale 2
Darn, I wanted to see the picture of your cute outfit! :) It took me a few more years into the parenting gig to let go.. glad you got it figure out early!
Poppy recently posted..Shoes are Important – Free Printable Triathlon Checklist
There are DEFINITELY good and bad sippies. There ARE. (And I hear you on the rest. Especially the “seeing the crumbs” thing.
Keely recently posted..Netflix Wants To Make Your Summer Easier (And Nicer).
It’s so important to get out and do our girly thing as mamas. Good for you for doing a ladies night! I might have one this weekend!
It looks like you had a great night out!
What about your anniversary? Did you have a chance to get away from everyday routine?
I’m so glad you had a good night out. When I leave, I check in, but I trust John. He is more the “Checker-inner” and sometimes that drives me NUTS. You ladies look like you had a lovely, sippy filled time. So glad!
XO
Kiran recently posted..Worth That Weight
Such a great night! Worth truckloads of spilled milk and leaky sippy cups!! xoxo
Good for you for getting out for a girls night! :)
I can understand the struggles of co-parenting for sure. Even within a tight partnership and long discussions leading to agreements on parenting and similar approaches for parenting, our partners will always do things differently from us. My DH is ‘Fun Dad’. Its all tickles and giggles. Bath time is loud, and silly and over-stimulating with ‘fun dad’ where with Mom (me) it is calming, and a wind down time before bed.
I’m pretty strict and maybe over the top controlling about my little guys food and what/when he eats… One day last week my DH let him taste his freezie… I have a no sugar rule.. But what am I to do/say- the father of my son also has choices and a say in such things. I just had to bite my tongue, luckily it was just a taste. Yay for Fun Dads! :P
This looks like a super fun night! Also even though I aspire to be a super dad, I can never remember which sippy cups are the ‘good’ ones and which ones are not.
Christopher D Drew recently posted..Good News Sackville- Nu Cafe
Yay for a night out!
I actually read this post out loud to my hubs because we are the same way. There are times when I have to sit him and Eddie down and have a “family talk” about the messes and how Mommy needs some help with keeping things neat…you know, if everyone wants a sane Mommy.
When Cort is left to his own devices, however, I don’t point out ANY messes. (or spilled milk…unless it starts to get stinky! Ha!)
Katie Sluiter recently posted..glitches
Dan sounds a lot like my captain at home. The socks , definitely the socks. But hey he makes dinner mosts nights. I could certainly use a night out, since I moved away from most of my friends its been hard. A date night is definitely in order this month . We are coming up on lucky number 13 on the 31st. After so much time together I learn to pick my battles and if no one is injured or will get scarred for life I am sure it will make a funny story later on.
So glad you had a fun time with your friends!
Alma recently posted..Blog love chain
Ooh, I’m still hunting for the perfect holy grail of sippy cups – I have some that are pretty good but I wouldn’t throw them in my purse and my littlest likes to pour the juice out and nothing has prevented this yet – he shakes and drops come out, he makes a mess with it – you get the picture..
So I would be interested in your rundown :)