Canadians are well aware of today’s relevance in the American calendar. We have American friends celebrating Thanksgiving today, (Happy Thanksgiving, friends!), emails, usually deleted with a smile and an eye-roll, are coming to our inbox wishing us Canadians a “Happy Thanksgiving”, and Black Friday has rolled out to Canada, ensuring that I have been glued to flyers all week long. So, I get it. And I am thankful today.
I am thankful for Canadian Thanksgiving.
That seems like a strange thing to say, I know. I am not looking to stir up any cross-border conflict with this statement. I think it could be easy to come up with reasons why having Thanksgiving in November is better than having it in October, or vice versa. In fact, I think Americans get an extra day off in their Thanksgiving weekend, and I would like to petition the Canadian government to consider this as well. But for the most part, Thanksgiving has the potential to be lovely and perfect in either country on either month.
Except for that one black stain on American Thanksgiving.
Let me express that I pretty much love all the holidays. Commercialism be darned, I am usually able to find real, non-commercial joy in Christmas and Valentine’s Day and Easter. Seeing Christmas decorations in the store and wreaths on street lamps and hearing Christmas jingles on television commercials just keep me in the Christmas spirit no matter where I am or what I am doing. You will rarely, if ever, hear me complaining about how commercial a holiday is getting, because I know that in my life, in my family, I have some control over the amount of commercialism we allow into our traditions.
But this year, I have come to a huge realization. I love Canadian Thanksgiving because it is essentially pure. Sure, I made my way to the grocery store for a two-for-one turkey deal a few weeks before Thanksgiving. And yes, I perused the empty grocery store shelves alongside many other last minute shoppers right before closing the night before my Thanksgiving dinner. But I was hosting dinner for the first time. I had recipes to prepare. And the reality is, I have to grocery shop on a weekly basis anyway, the only difference on Thanksgiving weekend was that I just happened to be looking for the exact same food that everyone else was.
But the stress of Thanksgiving had nothing to do with finding the best presents or getting the best deals or finding the right card for everyone around my table. My stress was a stress that people have been feeling for likely hundreds of years. My stress was from the hustle and bustle of preparing my home for guests, and preparing the table for a feast. Everything – every single thing – about my Thanksgiving happened because family was getting together.
Black Friday, and the newer concept of “Grey Thursday”, make me incredibly sad. In recent years, commercialism has crept closer and closer to a day of gratefulness that I am starting to wonder if it will overtake it altogether. Maybe it already has.
I sincerely understand the need to get deals. I will be making some online purchases at midnight tonight and I might even be at a store first thing tomorrow. Finances are always tight and Christmas is coming. BUT… it isn’t my Thanksgiving. I already had my Thanksgiving. I got together with my family last month. We needed to do nothing else all weekend. We cooked and baked and ate and got the kids in bed and sat up late laughing. It wasn’t rushed. The only place family needed to be was at their homes when the weekend ended. It was, in absolutely all ways, a family weekend.
It is possible to make shopping part of tradition, and I guess that isn’t always bad. I remember hearing stories from my Dad and his best friend as they went Christmas shopping together every year. And my husband loves Boxing Day shopping, a concept that was definitely foreign to me until he came into my life. I can understand making shopping a part of Thanksgiving tradition, but when it eats into a holiday that calls us to be thankful for what we have, and instead takes us away from family and food and time, I just cannot dig that.
So today, I am thankful that I can participate in Black Friday without it coming anywhere near my Thanksgiving. I’ll keep my non-commercial holiday and my deals separate, please and Thank You.
Happy Thanksgiving, American friends. I hope it is beautiful and pure and full of grace.
I think that Canadian Thanksgiving does tend to be a bit more relaxing in the sense that if stores are open, there is no big holiday rush for deals back in October. I understand the deals are great and would be hard to miss. I hope that everyone still gets lots time with their families, too, and a chance to truly enjoy all the things for which they are grateful. :)
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I hadn’t considered the contrast between the two holidays before. This is an interesting reflection for sure. Thanks for sharing.
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I know a lot of people that go with their moms or sisters or friends super early on Black Friday, and it’s a tradition all by itself. I won’t be waking up before dawn to get deals that only last four hours. Maybe it’s worth it, probably not (it’s freezing). But some people enjoy it. I’m not crazy about “Black Friday” starting on Thursday, but I know A LOT of non-retail workers that have to work on Thanksgiving every year anyway. And some people don’t mind leaving their house in the afternoon (hello, too much family time or needing time and a half?). I worked once on Black Friday and had to be there at, like, 4:30 am. So, you know…it’s a toss up, really. I’ll be going with my MIL and the girls to see a movie after our big dinner this evening, and I’m looking forward to it.
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My mom and I have been talking in the kitchen over food prep…. and I told her how I hate that today, all of us here in the USA are spewing about how grateful we are for this and that… and these same people will be clubbing/beating each other over the head to buy the next best thing tomorrow at whatever store at 5 a.m.
it makes me sick.
and i hope you know not ALL Americans are like this. and I’m not like this.
tomorrow, my Dan and I are hoping to maybe have lunch together and see a movie.
ps you should still have a package from me…. i was hoping it would arrive today maybe….or tomorrow….
xoxo
I agree with you on this. Thanksgiving should be a time spend with family and friends. A time for relaxing and sharing what we are grateful or thankful for.
I cannot fathom the idea of standing outside in line for all hours of the day/night to wait for a store to open to get a deal. I will never do it. (And besides I live in the bush in the middle of nowhere, so it isn’t really possible. LOL!)
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I never knew about Black Friday until I started blogging (well, I *knew* but didn’t really understand it), and yes, it makes me a little sad that it’s so commercialized. But I also understand that it’s one day of the year that many people can grab the stuff they normally can’t afford, so power to them if they want to brave the crowds.
Personally I’ve never tried shopping online for Black Friday deals, but I’m tempted!
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This article just revived me through sharing some inspiring notes. Particularly that Oprah Winfrey and Frank A. Clark quotes are really made my mind thinking. It’s really worth thanking God what so far he blessed us and I’m very thankful whatever I got now. Anyways Happy Thanksgiving and hopefully you’ll have a great Black Friday shopping!!
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We Americans – with our doorbusters and fourth-down plays in football and spelling centre as “center.” I think more of us are staying home on Friday mornings every year. I’d rather park it on the couch and enjoy some football than fight the crowds!
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I like when you said that you allow as much commericalism into your holidays as you want. I’m much the same way. There’s no reason for me to complain; I can decide to participate or not. The spirit of the season is within my heart, not just in the absence of shopping.
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