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a blog by Laura O'Rourke

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When You Asked Me To Marry You

Guest Post on Mommy Miracles

Writing Vows

When Laura asked me to write for her Marriage Vows series, I thought it would be a breeze. I had all these ideas: I would write about our “contract” and what works for our marriage, my ideas for inexpensive dates, or how having an interracial Hispanic-Asian Indian marriage has impacted us. They’re all too serious and I’m not feeling it, I will save them for another day.

Superhubby and I met in college. We had our share of ups and downs while we dated, tests of how strong our love really was. When we got engaged, someone had told us that if you can survive the engagement, you can survive anything. It was a challenge mixing his boisterous, Mariachi-loving family with my quiet, elegant, bookworm family.

Our marriage hasn’t been perfect but we both work hard at keeping the other happy. He tells me what he needs physically. I tell him how I feel emotionally. We are there to support each other with our goals and dreams. We tell each other “thank you” for those big and little things we do for each other every day. We don’t take each other for granted. We still flirt with each other and sneak kisses without the kids catching us. I still think he’s the most gorgeous man I’ve ever met. He and the kids call me “beautiful” despite my own self-consciousness about how Rheumatoid Arthritis has damaged my body and those last few pounds I can’t lose. He makes me laugh. I like to surprise him. We make time for dates every chance we get. We give each other a night off from family duty every week to do whatever we want, feel like an adult and not just a parent. Love, respect, trust and laughter is at the heart of our marriage and we are lucky to have each other.

So today I am writing from my heart, what our marriage means to me. I dedicate this post to my Superhubby, my love for the last 20 years and husband for 16.

When You Asked Me To Marry You

By Tanya M @ Mom’s Small Victories

When you asked me to marry you, you had to ask me twice. I couldn’t believe after all we’d been through, you’d still want me as your wife.

When you asked me to marry you, you brought tears to my eyes with the words that came from your heart and soul. Proposing in the church where we’d get married and make our family whole.

When you asked me to marry you, our faith was tested when we lost our first child and only daughter, born still and much too early. You sing to her “On Eagle’s Wings” and give her one last kiss. But all these years later, I know you hurt as I still do, I hope Maya knows she’s missed.

When you asked me to marry you, I never doubted you would be a great dad. Our three sons will attest, you’re their superhero, their playmate, their comedian, their teacher. Simply the best.

When you asked me to marry you, we were healthy and had no reason to suspect. That a couple years later Rheumatoid Arthritis would invade my body and put “in sickness and in health” to a test. I am thankful you appreciate my hard work on my good days and on my bad, know that all I can do is rest.

When you asked me to marry you,I never thought I could love you more than that moment you slipped the ring on my finger. I was wrong, like our kids, our love has changed and grown. Right now is the moment I love you most, and I hope this is clearly and forever known.

 

Thanks to my Superhubby for always making me feel special and loved. And Thanks to Laura for allowing me to share my honest feelings in her fantastic series about marriage.

 

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Writing Vows

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  2. Tanya, thank you so much for being here today and for sharing this lovely poem with us. I am so in love with how you took this prompt and it sounds like you and your husband are rocking marriage – because you’re focusing on the right things.

    Again, I really love this! Thank you!
    Laura O’Rourke recently posted..When You Asked Me To Marry YouMy Profile

  4. What an absolutely beautiful testament to love and life with another.
    Marriage and parenting are one of the hardest things I’ve ever done and I know it’s like that for so many others.

    Yet, even in sickness, even in hard times, I love seeing a husband and wife braving those storms with the umbrella of love (and patience and compromise and laughter) above them.

    Thank you for sharing your story. :)
    Kir recently posted..EnsueMy Profile

  5. This is so lovely. It’s amazing how much things can change from the time you get engaged to into full-fledged marriage and beyond, but I love when couples grow stronger through it all.
    Greta @gfunkified recently posted..Seven?! SEVEN!My Profile

  6. You mention working hard and it IS a lot of work to stay married and be in the marriage and make it what each partner needs it to be. I see you know this and I am happy to read it. Thank you for sharing so honestly about your marriage and congratulations on so many years together – here’s to many more! :)

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